Vulvodynia Self Support
- Orit Zilberman
- 7 days ago
- 5 min read
I just finished posting a series of 5 Instagram posts about self-support for vulvodynia, pain in the vulva that lasts more than 3 months without a clear cause.
Below you'll find the content of the first four posts. The fifth, explaining how to self-massage the acupressure point Hui Yin, felt important enough to deserve its own dedicated post, and it got one.
Post One: Avoid Irritants
One of the first recommendations in many Western medical approaches is to reduce potential irritants.
Small, everyday exposures, from fabrics to personal care products, can increase sensitivity over time.
In this post, I share simple ways to minimise irritation in daily life.
Chemicals can irritate sensitive vulvar tissue
Practical ways to reduce irritation:
Clothing & laundry
100% cotton underwear
Avoid synthetic fabrics
Use unscented ecologic detergent
Washing & care
Wash vulva with lukewarm water only
Avoid long contact with water
No intimate washes
Avoid contact with soaps/shampoo
Everyday products
Unscented ecological toilet paper - tap instead of wipe
Use a mobile bidet if toilet paper is too painful
Avoid daily pantylinersUse organic cotton menstrual products
Small changes can reduce irritation over time
Post 2: Friction & pressure
Local pressure and friction often increase sensitivity in the vulvar area.
Daily habits, from clothing to sitting positions, can influence how the tissue responds over time.
In this post, I share simple ways to reduce friction and pressure in everyday life.
Daily habits
Avoid tight clothing
Choose loose, soft fabrics
Prefer hipster underwear over thongs
Pressure & movement
Avoid long periods of sitting or cycling
Change a bike seat designed for female pelvis
Take regular breaks to stand and move
Sitting tips
Use a donut cushion
Adjust posture regularly (e.g one leg elevated)
In the office:
Work in a standing position when possible
If not, take regular breaks to stand and stretch
If you work from home, try sitting on a yoga mat instead of a chair and table
Reducing pressure can ease sensitivity over time
Post 3: Stress & nervous system
Stress and pain don't just feel connected, they are. Research shows that stress triggers inflammation in the body, and inflammation amplifies pain signals. At the same time, living with chronic pain increases stress. Over time, this becomes a cycle that's hard to break.
The body's stress response plays a central role. When it's in a constant state of alert, even normal sensations can be perceived as painful. Calming the body's stress response isn't just relaxation, it's a meaningful part of supporting the body.
In today's post I share simple ways to gently interrupt this cycle: movement, yoga, mindfulness, breathing, and two simple techniques to activate the vagus nerve.
None of these require extra time or replace individual treatment, but they can fit into your daily routine and be a real support alongside it.
If stress makes your pain worse, here's why:
Stress and pain feed each other
Stress triggers inflammation in the body
Inflammation amplifies pain signals
Pain increases stress, and the cycle continues
The good news: there are simple ways to calm the body's stress response
Gentle movement can help reduce inflammation and to break the stress cycle
Replace short trips by bike, tram or car with walking
Walking in nature is ideal, but any walking counts, also in the city while doing your errands
Gently rotate your joints daily especially the pelvis - while brushing your teeth or waiting for the kettle
Yoga: 2 simple postures to gently open the pelvis and create more space
Badha konasana - butterfly position - try it whenever you can sit on the floor instead of a chair
Supta Badha konasana - reclining butterfly position - you can try it in bed before going to sleep or when waking up
Mindfulness: When pain or stress spikes, bring yourself back to the present moment by:
Name 3 things you can see
Name 2 things you can touch
Name 1 thing you can hear
Breathing: inhale to the count of 4, pause 1, exhale to the count of 8
if it feels too hard, exhale as if you hold a straw between your lips
A longer exhale activates the parasympathetic nervous system
3-4 breathing cycles a few times a day can make a big difference
Vagus nerve: 2 simple techniques to stimulate it
Gently rub or massage your ears, especially the upper rim
Slowly move your eyes all the way left, then all the way right
The vagus nerve is your body's main calming pathway - stimulating it sends a safety signal to your whole system
A calmer nervous system can reduce how intensely pain is felt.
Post 4: Topical Support
The vulvar area is one of the most sensitive tissues in the body, what feels fine elsewhere can cause significant irritation here. This includes products that seem completely natural or harmless.
In this post I share what many women with vulvodynia find helpful for external comfort, and what commonly makes things worse. These are not treatments, and they don't address the underlying condition. But for day-to-day comfort, small choices can make a real difference.
A note on tea tree oil: it's widely recommended online for vulvar complaints, but for vulvodynia specifically it can be too irritating. It may only be considered if a lab test has confirmed a vaginal infection, and even then, with caution.
As always, observe how your body responds to anything new, and stop immediately if irritation increases.
What to avoid
First, a few things that often make things worse:
Hot water and steam directly on the vulva
Products containing petroleum or mineral oil
Anything with fragrance and preservatives
Tea tree oil — too concentrated and irritating for vulvodynia, even if it feels natural
Before applying anything new
Always patch test first:
Apply a small amount on your inner thigh
Wait 24 hours
If no reaction, test on a small area of the vulva
Only then use more widely
Your vulva is more sensitive than the rest of your skin - what works elsewhere may not work here
Some women find comfort with:
Organic cold-pressed coconut oil
Organic almond oil
Unscented shea butter
External use only Use a clean, separate container - not from your kitchen, Discard after 1 year of opening
For burning sensation
Some women find temporary relief with:
A cold gel pack wrapped in organic cotton cloth
A lukewarm baking soda bath - 1 tbsp per litre of water, up to 10 minutes
Always start with a lower concentration and increase gradually based on your skin's response
For itching
Some women find coconut oil helpful If that's not enough, some find comfort with Weleda Baby Nappy Change Cream (Calendula) - gentle, unscented, and well tolerated by sensitive skin
Important: Oils and Condoms
Never use oil-based products with latex condoms - oils can damage latex and reduce protection.
For lubrication, choose a water-based or aloe-based lubricant instead. We love The oh collective for their natural lubricant options 🌿
Listen to your body - it will tell you what helps and what doesn't
Questions or experiences to share? Write in the comments or reach out privately.
This information is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for individual medical advice. If you are experiencing persistent symptoms, please consult a qualified healthcare professional before trying any new approach.
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